How to be a wuss.

I didn't have the keys to the apartment, and I needed to use the washroom. Typical.

I decided to shorten my wait and just use the washroom by the gym on the first floor. It was usually open and since there wouldn't be any people using it at this time, it would be convenient. I swung my car door open and headed to the elevators.

I saw him look at me as I walked by, and just as the elevator door closed, I caught a glimpse of his stare again. He was the building's security guard, a new guy, I don't know him very well. He was an old Indian/Pakistani/Bengali guy, probably in his mid 50s with bad posture. I hoped it was just a watchful stare, but I had bigger worries - like getting to the damn washroom. Quick.

From a blurry memory of a summer day there, I kind of remembered the way to go. I heard the elevator doors close behind me and the hallway was dark. I ran to the washroom and suddenly heard footsteps as I was about to finish up. Shit. I prayed it wasn't him.

He was standing at the entrance to the washroom, blocking my way out as I washed my hands. Fuck!

"Madam, who are you here for?"
my friend lives here, sorry, just needed to use the washroom and I didnt want to wait.

"I've seen you here before..."
Yes, my friend lives here.

"Are you African?"
No

"But your friend is African?"
.....I'm Indian.

I suddenly see him coming toward me. My heart had already left the building. I'm shaking. "I have to go" and I tried to dodge him. He grabbed my waist. I pushed him. He grabbed my hand and I pushed him harder.

"I'm Indian too" he said. "Are you sure your friend is just a friend?....not just a friend correct?"

"Leave me alone" I pushed him again and tried to get past him. It wasnt a physical struggle, but I was scared in retrospect. I didn't want to touch him. Not even slap him. I just wanted to leave. I start heading back to the elevators. He starts pleading. He grabbed my hair and I started to get louder, push harder, walk faster.

"Hey, I'll pay you, I have money" he yelled at me.

At this point I was visibly shaking and he was backing off. I figured he could hear the people in the elevator and that he would back off. He did.

I got into an elevator filled with about 6 people who seemed like they were leaving a party. I got out one floor below and ran back in disbelief..

I am safe. Nothing happened. But my mind won't stop replaying the fear. I just feel weak and stupid.


Note: This happened to me yesterday. What was I wearing? Who was I waiting for? Where was I? What time was it?. These are questions I do not feel like answering, because it should not matter. The incident went unreported (Can you guess why?).